Who would have thought that this intolerable job would give me the chance to show my skills as a detective? Not me! The paper is sending someone over to interview me shortly, so I’ve got just enough time to tell you what happened.

I’m Sam Jaspers, and I work the night shift, cleaning up and washing the dishes here at the Palace Diner. Some Palace! The counters are so old that the yellow stains are permanent. The regulars would miss them if they ever got scrubbed away, my boss said. Oh yes, the boss (and chef) is Tom Greene. He has owned the place for years. Some say he won it in a crap game. If you ask me, I bet he lost the crap game, and had to take it over!