The White House Ghosts

Written by William Shepard

The four ghosts took a look around the East Room before beginning their monthly card game. Invisible to all but themselves, they left no trace on the White House motion detectors. It was complete privacy, of a sort that each might have wished for when president.

“I never cease to marvel at how this room has changed,” John Adams said. “Abigail and I used to come here to supervise matters when they were building the White House. Somehow, I never pictured this room quite so grand as it has become.”

Andrew Jackson scoffed. “Well, John, that shouldn’t surprise you. I suspect that you wanted a grand setting all the time. I was never sure that you liked the people very much.”

“That’s unfair, Andrew. We made the revolution for everyone. And as for a ‘grand setting,’ your inauguration certainly trashed the White House. Why, the only way they got rid of all of the drunks who invited themselves into the reception in this very room was to say that the drinks were being moved to the lawn. Then as the mob left, the White House staff shut the doors after them!”

“Hardly my fault, John. Anyway, you talk about preserving the property, but I was the first to order spittoons for the East Room! I got into trouble for that, too, because of the expense. Well, OK, enough of that. Deal the cards, please.”

Calvin Coolidge asked, “Is it true, Andrew, that ‘OK’ was what you initialled on state papers when you approved them? The rumor is that you thought that OK stood for ‘All Correct’!”

“Too late now to stop that rumor, Calvin. If I didn’t do that, I should have. Besides, you’re the one with the reputation for not saying much.”

Calvin Coolidge grinned. “Yes.” He looked at his cards. “One heart.”

William Howard Taft shifted his weight as though he could still feel discomfort in his ghostly state. (Even as a ghost, he remained large.) “I still don’t see why the White House uses these little spindly chairs.”

“William, did you really once get stuck in the bathtub?”

William Howard Taft looked annoyed for a moment, then broke into a large smile. “Well yes, John. The White House ushers had quite a time getting me out! At least I was taking my bath in private. Unlike you, John. One spade.”

“Hasn’t everyone heard that story by now? Well, I admit it: Washington was almost uninhabited then, very few visitors on horseback to be bothered with. I used to like to go swimming—skinny dipping I think they call it now—in the Potomac. And once some miscreant stole my clothes from the bank, so I had to send back to the White House for more. Two diamonds.”

Andrew Jackson looked at his cards, folded them, and tossed them onto the table. “This isn’t a real game, not like poker. I don’t see why I let you fellows talk me into this. Let’s do something different this month.”

“What did you have in mind?”

“Well, you know, there is a new family residing in the White House. The election has been held, and the results tallied, and they have just moved in. You remember, eight years ago, the same thing happened. And surely you remember what we did then?”

“Yes,” John Adams replied. “We left something for the children. When you put the idea forward then, you mentioned your adopted son, what a comfort he had been. It’s a wonderful tribute to him. I wonder if the last White House children ever figured out who our little mystery.”

“Probably not,” said Calvin Coolidge. “But it’s a good idea, General. I remember how wonderful it was to have children in the White House. And animals—like my pet raccoon, Rebecca. The least we can do is make these new children feel welcome.”

“What shall we leave?” William Howard Taft asked.

“A mystery, like last time, that’ll be fun. Let’s leave a little something that is specific to one of our terms as president, and see if the girls know their history.”

“OK,” said Andrew Jackson. “But what?”

“Well,” replied William Howard Taft, “it shouldn’t be to hard to figure out. We each did other things besides serving as president. I mean, you, Andrew, were General Jackson at the Battle of New Orleans. John was vice president, and an ambassador to France before that. I became Chief Justice of the United States after I left this miserable job, and Calvin was governor of Massachusetts. Together, we should figure out something!”

“Yes,” Calvin Coolidge agreed. “And it should be something like the last time; that is, a symbol for peace. Begging your pardon, General, but after all the great wars we have seen, peace remains a great virtue. And it costs less, too! We were each lucky to have avoided great wars while we were in office.”

“Not ‘lucky,’” grumbled John Adams. “It takes a lot of effort. Why, there were those who wanted war with France throughout my term. I wouldn’t give in. That’s surely why I was the first one term president!”

“I just missed it. War during my presidency, I mean.” William Howard Taft reflected for a moment. “Now, Theodore Roosevelt might have enjoyed himself. He probably thought he was president at the wrong time anyway. But I’m sure that Woodrow Wilson, who came after me, had his hands full with the Great War. But we’re getting carried away here. Let’s get back to our mystery for the new White House children.”

The ghosts put their heads together and discussed their game well into the night … ****

The next morning, two excited little girls were awakened for breakfast. At their places at the breakfast table were a piece of paper and a small box. Their mother smiled indulgently, for surely her husband had left the note and box as a surprise for the children.

The younger girl read the paper. It was in a clear script, bold and easy to read: “To the White House children—may your stay be filled with joy. Can you guess which one of us left this gift for you?” It was signed “Your friends, John Adams, Andrew Jackson, William Howard Taft, Calvin Coolidge.”

The girls’ mother smiled at her husband, who returned the smile.

The older girl opened the box. Her eyes sparkled with excitement. Inside was a large Christmas tree ornament, in the shape of the White House. On its side was a delicately painted scene, a view of the nation’s capital. A full eight inches across, the ornament would fit nicely on a large branch of a sturdy Christmas tree.

“Look, here is where we stayed, before moving into the White House,” she said. “This little painting shows the view from our picture window at the Hay-Adams Hotel.”

It was indeed, her mother noticed, except that there was a horse-drawn carriage painted into the scene. She wondered where her husband had found it. “I see a hinge on the side of that beautiful ornament—it might open up. Try it and see.”

The little girl’s younger sister said, “My turn!” She lifted the top of the ornament and sure enough, it opened. Inside was painted another tiny scene, this one of the Statue of Liberty, with American flags unfurled. “They look like our flags, almost,” she said, “but the stars are too small to count.”

There was, however, clearly visible in the harbor facing the statue, a ship, with soldiers on the deck. One of the soldiers, draped in a tricolor flag, seemed to be wearing a spiked helmet.

At that moment, a White House waiter of long service appeared. The president looked at him quizzically. “Something like this happened eight years ago, sir,” the waiter said. “The girls then had a lot of fun trying to figure out which of the presidents who had signed their note might have left the gift, which was also a White House ornament. But it was quite different from this one.”

The president whispered to his wife as he got up from the table to go to the Oval Office for the day’s business. “The letter from the last president told me about the ornament left for his children eight years ago. He was quite sure there would be a similar mystery left for our girls on their first morning at the White House!”

He added, “I’m sure that you will help the children to figure out which one of my predecessors left this charming gift for them.”

The president left the room, and the children, under the gentle prodding of their mother, soon resolved the mystery.